Fight The Storm
By ~ Aldalas
~<~^~>~
Shudder, shudder, twitch, shuffle, moan.
“No,” he whispered, but the nightmare continued.
Gasp! Gasp, gasp, gasp, shudder, gasp, and then finally . . . sob.
“No . . . no! No please, I didn’t mean to . . . no, please no . . .” Quiet, almost inaudible sobs. But still not silent enough that the elf a short distance away could not hear.
Legolas couldn’t take it anymore. He had been on watch since midnight, protectively caring for the sleeping fellowship. They were only a day outside Moria, now quickly on their way to Lothlorien. But something inside the fellowship had died, the protection they had known had been torn away from them in an instant . . . watching Gandalf fall into a seemingly endless abyss with a fire-cloaked balrog. The wizard had saved them all, but now, the chain that had held the fellowship together in an unbreakable bond had been snapped – the loose ends trailing behind them like echoes of the past, a constant reminder of who they had once been.
The elf stood from the secluded spot he had picked and walked over next to the shaking form of his oldest human friend. Legolas had quietly listened to his friend’s uneven and heavy breathing, but when Aragorn had begun to speak to the darkness around him, falling into his nightmarish dreams, pleading for release, Legolas responded to the unbidden cry for help and tried to aid his friend.
Not wanting to wake any of the others, Legolas knelt close to the human and whispered his name.
“Aragorn?” There was no response ~ Aragorn was still trapped within the pain-filled jaws of his nightmare.
Legolas sat down next to the young man’s side and touched his shoulder. “Aragorn?”
His touch and his words brought on a reaction Legolas never would have expected.
Aragorn snapped awake, eyes blazing at some unknown enemy and bolted upright, softly but harshly crying out “Leave me!” as he did so. His sudden movement caught Legolas by surprise, and Aragorn slammed into his chest.
Legolas’ surprise was short-lived; the moment Aragorn’s body made contact with his own he quickly wrapped he arms around the man as Aragorn tried to back away from him. The struggle was quickly stopped as Aragorn fully woke up and realized what truly held him. When Aragorn ceased to move Legolas loosened his hold, but the elf did not back away ~ he couldn’t. For as soon as his hold loosened, Aragorn wrapped his own arms around the prince and began to sob.
Worry and confusion struck a fire in the elf’s heart. What was wrong? He had not seen Aragorn cry in years ~ many, many years. Legolas again tightened his hold on his friend as Aragorn buried his face in the prince’s tunic and quietly released his moans. Legolas didn’t understand, but he knew that when Estel was ready, he would tell him.
Several quiet minutes passed as Legolas held Aragorn tightly, even his keen elven hearing barely picking up any of the human’s heart-softened pain. Legolas glanced around at the fellowship for a brief moment before again turning his full attention to the miserable human. He braced the human’s head against his chest with one hand and rubbed his shoulder gently, comfortingly with the other. As he did so, he patiently waited.
Finally responding to the soothing confinement that Legolas was giving him, Aragorn ceased to shake from his still unknown sorrow. He turned his head and relaxed, listening to the strong beating of an elven heart. He was forever grateful that Legolas knew him so well, and knew that what the young man needed right then was comfort.
When Legolas decided it was time, he gently asked the question. “Aragorn what happened? What’s wrong my friend?”
Aragorn shuddered slightly as the memory sharpened the pain in his heart, but he did not withdraw. “I had a dream,” He whispered. “About Frodo.”
“Frodo?” Legolas looked over at the small cluster of hobbits – Frodo smack in the middle, peacefully sleeping as well as he could. The past events were horrifyingly hard on his already burdened spirit, but he obviously felt safe and protected nestling in between those he considered family.
“Yes. About Frodo. It has been long my friend, since I have had anything frighten me so badly, if even at all!” Aragorn tightened his hands into fists in the elf’’s cloak. “In my dream we were still traveling ~ we stopped by a river’s edge. As to which one I have no idea, for my dream did not allow much detail so I could tell. We set up a small camp and made plans to continue on to Mordor. You warned me ~” Aragorn’s voice caught slightly. “that something felt wrong. You wanted to keep moving, but for the hobbit’s sake and our own I convinced you to wait so we could rest. I did not listen to you.” Aragorn stopped and sighed regretfully.
“Do not stop there Estel, keep going.” Legolas said quietly as he continued to rub the human’s shoulder. “You have done me no harm.”
“Not yet,” Aragorn continued. “But I shall. Frodo left us without telling anyone. We all began to search for him, but as we left the campsite I noticed that Boromir was also missing. I feared the worst, for you know of his special interest in the Ring.” Legolas only nodded. Aragorn had already expressed his concerns to the elf long ago.
“I searched by myself carefully, and finally I found him. I called his name; he turned around swiftly, horrified, but then he quickly told me that the Ring had taken Boromir. Afraid, I demanded in my frightened state to know where the Ring was. My voice was harsh, and he backed away from me. I again called him and reminded him of my vow, but then he asked me a question.” Aragorn again shut his eyes as a few tears squeezed out, but continued to speak. “He asked me if I could protect him from myself ~ if I would destroy the Ring. And then he opened his hand and revealed It. The small round circle of gold, such a small thing, and yet I could feel it’s power so clearly, feel and hear it calling to me! And I . . .”
“Please keep going my friend.”
“I . . . I reached for it, and suddenly an unknown desire rose up within me, telling me to take it, that it should be mine, it’s within my bloodline to wield it, that I needed it! But there was still the other side of me, telling me it was wrong, that the Ring does nothing but corrupt and destroy, that if I took it I would destroy myself, and all the world.” Again silver tears fell from his tight-shut eyes, and this time, they did not stop. “But it wasn’t enough. I could hear it calling my name. It was as if I had no control over myself anymore . . . I . . .” Aragorn’s voice grew so soft that if Legolas had not had elf ears he never would have heard. Legolas gripped the human tighter, afraid, and at the same time, knew what Aragorn was going to say. “. . . I took the ring.”
Aragorn clenched his teeth, shut his eyes tightly and held on to Legolas with a death grip, as though he feared the elf would back away from him in horror. But Legolas did not move, didn’t even try. He knew that with Gandalf gone it was only a matter of time until Aragorn dreamed something to this extreme, and that the human was losing faith in himself faster than he could ever imagine. To back away from Aragorn now was something the elf would never do, and if he did Aragorn would never find his faith in himself again.
“But it doesn’t even stop there!” Aragorn half-sobbed, not loosening his death grip as though his very life depended on it. “I looked at the Ring in my hand and then to the terrified look on Frodo’s face, and a new thought came to me . . . “ Aragorn’s voice now shook with sobs. “. . . something told me that no one can ever know that I am now the new ringbearer, Frodo can’t live to tell anyone what I had done . . . I no longer had control over myself, I couldn’t stop it . . . the next thing I knew my sword was in my hand . . . dripping with blood . . . Frodo was crumpled on the ground . . . the Ring was laughing in my ears . . .and I could do nothing . . . NOTHING . . . to stop it . . . I failed him . . . I failed you . . . I failed myself . . . I could do nothing . . . Oh Legolas!” and Aragorn began to sob again, this time if possible even harder than before.
Legolas rocked him back and forth gently, wrapping both arms tightly about Aragorn’s shoulders, whispering to him softly. “Shh . . . Aragorn peace . . . it’s all right, you have done nothing wrong, my friend, nothing wrong, it was only a dream . . . only a dream . . . shh . . .”
“B-but what if it c-comes tr-true?! What if I-I am t-too w-weak for th-this? . . .” Aragorn rasped through his almost silent cries.
“There are many things I would call you my friend,” Legolas whispered in the heartbroken man’s ear. “but weak has never been among them. Please Aragorn, be at peace.”
“H-how do you k-know? How d-do you know I-I’m not g-go-going to b-be when th-this ha-happens?”
Tears of pain and frustration began to form in the prince’s eyes. Pain for his friend’s fears, and frustration at his own so-far innability to help him. “How do I know?” Legolas moved aside the young man’s sleep-rumpled hair and entertwined his fingers in the dark locks, his hand gently cradling the side of the sobbing human’s face. He leaned his head over Aragorn’s, resting his cheek against the man’s forehead, and calmly spoke to him. “Because I know you. All the long years of our friendship and your strengths are all I have seen. This may not be something that you will conquer right now Aragorn, but it is something that I know you can conquer . . . and you will conquer. You don’t need to prove it to anyone but yourself.” Legolas gently stroked the side of Aragorn’s face with his thumb. “Believe in yourself, and you need not fear.”
Slowly the sobs ceased. Aragorn turned his head upward to meet the gaze of the one not inches from his own. “I said it before,” he rasped quietly, his throat sore from his cries. “I will never know what I did to deserve a friend like you. Never. Thank you.” Aragorn shut his eyes, his grip loosening to a tight embrace that Legolas returned. “Thank you.”
¨ ¨ ¨
A small sigh escaped his lips as he again settled under his cloak and relaxed. He hadn’t meant to eavesdrop, but he had been awoken when Aragorn had bolted upright, and had not been able to fall asleep agin, especially with a conversation such as that one had been going.
Never before had he guessed that such a bond had grown between these two friends. He knew they were close, but never that close. Calming the other’s fears with a soft spoken word of assurance and love, like brothers ~ brothers of the heart.
He had carefully listened to Aragorn tell his dream, horrified at the tale, but entranced. He never thought he would listen to Aragorn sob, or Legolas be there to comfort him like he did. The dream was not something Aragorn wanted, and that the man grieved greatly because of it. The little hobbit had heard it in his voice. No matter what anyone said, he knew Aragorn was a good and loyal man. He would never have reason to doubt him again. And Legolas was a faithful friend ~ that he would never doubt either.
He shifted slightly and closed his eyes. ‘I’m glad I could find that out about them. It’s an amazing friendship they share.’ The hobbit reached into his tunic by force of habit and checked that the chain and the Ring was still there. ‘I know Aragorn can overcome anything with encouragment like that. Believe in yourself, Aragorn.’ Thought Frodo as sleep claimed him. ‘Believe in yourself, and you need not fear.’
The End